Signs That We Need Some Time Alone

Getting easily frustrated

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The number one sign that you need some time alone is when you find yourself rolling your eyes, sighing and heavily judging the people you're around. You can't stand their train of thought or everything they're doing is bothering you? You need to take a second (at least) for yourself.

Our heartbeat gets faster

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Sometimes, it's not the emotional elements but the physical symptoms our bodies are exhibiting that mean we need to take a minute. Our heart rate increasing means that we're stressed, and when we're stressed, we need to exercise some self-care in whatever form we feel.

Concentration goes out the window

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You might be in the library with your classmates, or trying to get an Excel sheet balanced at work, but you cannot seem to focus on the task at hand. This is our brain telling us that we need to take a time out, get away from the situation we're in and give ourselves a breather.

Uncontrollable thoughts

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If you can't focus, you can't control your thoughts. You want to keep your attention to the task at hand and you're sure you could, but your brain will not let you. It is wandering off, possibly into something else that you want to get done, like spending some time taking care of yourself by yourself.

Feelings of anxiety

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If you have Generalised Anxiety Disorder, like Monica from Friends, this feeling can crop up at any time, but it's especially prevalent when you need a minute alone. You might not have GAD, but you still feel this way. Walk away from the situation you're in and plant yourself solidly in some me-time.

The desperate need to cry

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Sadly, when we feel overwhelmed or like we have no control on a situation or we feel incredibly angry, it's not the words that want to flow, but tears. That build up of pressure you're feeling might be helped by letting yourself cry and getting all of your emotions out and in the open.

No interest in other people

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I don't know about you but if I am feeling frustrated and anxious, other people become less of a priority to me. I am not interested in listening to them, but just getting through whatever event I'm at. It's not fair on them and it's not fair on you. You both deserve better.

No interest in anything

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Eeyore is the perfect example of being overstimulated and stressed-out; he hasn't taken the time to look after himself and he's eventually become depressed. Depression go hand in hand with losing interest in our loved ones, our likes and our hobbies. We can't get joy from the things we once did.

Getting overwhelmed

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Sweaty palms? Uncontrollable thoughts? Desperate need to run away? You're overwhelmed and this often comes from spending too much time with other people. You need a moment to quiet your thoughts, away from all of the chaos, which then will help you feel refreshed and ready to socialise again.

Not wanting to eat

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If you feel as though you've got too much on, too many people to talk to, too many things to sort for other people, food does not become a priority. It loses its importance, which then means you don't eat and can lead to even further sadness. Go spend some time alone with a burger or something light. Get your energy up and look after yourself.

But definitely wanting to drink

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If when you're around other people, especially when you haven't had any alone time, and you feel like you need a drink, it is completely normal. You aren't having fun and, in order to have fun, you feel like you need to have a glass of wine. When that happens, maybe seperate yourself and grab a cup of tea. There's nothing a cup of tea can't make better.

Overwhelming exhaustion

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You might seem smiley and happy, but really, spending time with other people socialising or even just being in their presence, can completely drain your energy and make you feel as though you're exhausted. Go put your pyjamas on and have a nap! You deserve it.

Tasks are left uncompleted

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These tasks, shopping, cleaning, tidying, mending, organising, require a level of concentration and determination to crack through the boredom, that being exhausted and stressed does not accommodate. You end up leaving those tasks undone because you cannot summon the strength to get on with them, which then just makes you feel even more overwhelmed. It's a vicious cycle.

TV has never sounded better

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You can tell you need to be alone when it's not real people that are getting you through the day, but fictional characters. You would give anything to turn your brain off and just sit on the couch and watch Friends or Seinfeld or Golden Girls all night. You don't need to ask permission - go do it!

Difficulty sleeping

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You have spent all day with other people, the only moment of piece you get by yourself before it all starts again tomorrow is this time in bed. But the trouble is that you can't sleep because you're nervous and overstimulated by the idea of seeing people again tomorrow. You need a moment to yourself.

You're burnt out

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This term floats around the news so much, sometimes it feels like it's made up and not applicable to us. Being burnt out basically means that you feel completely and utterly exhausted, unable to accomplish anything or give energy to the things you need to. Sound familiar?

Agitation at the smallest thing

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It might be the way your friend is chewing, or how often they say literally, or how they keep tapping their pen against the table. It can be any number of tiny little things, but they accumulate so you are one big amalgam of anger and fury. You have no choice but to Hulk out!

You're always on the go

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You might as well be permanently in sneakers, you race around so much. When was the last time you weren't in the car or on your feet or waiting for the next thing to happen? You can't remember it's been so long. You need to stop, take a deep breath, and realise that everything can wait until you have taken the time to relax.

You haven't taken time for yourself in a while

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You have had an Amazon parcel sat on your desk for weeks. What's in it? A new perfume, a new eyeshadow and a really beautiful bracelet Instagram recommended. You were so excited when you ordered it, but you haven't even had time to open the box, let alone use any of it.

Too many people rely on you

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Having loved ones rely on you can feel really lovely, knowing that these magical people trust you with their lives. But it can also be a lot of responsibility and pressure, especially when you're not feeling particularly appreciated. They need to let you have some time alone, for your own sanity as well as the precious future of their calendars!

Nothing is funny

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A lack of humour can be a very tough thing, especially in this current climate. Normally, you can make a joke out of anything and you don't take life too seriously. But if you're finding that you aren't finding a single thing funny, maybe go lie in bed, put some Saturday Night Live on and remember that you can find the funny in life, you just need some alone time to do it.

Lack of connection with others

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Empathy usually flows out of you like a fountain, but recently, you've found it difficult to connect with your loved ones, co-workers and really anybody who wants your time. It's making conversations tough to get through and connections are becoming lost. You need to connect with yourself before you can connect with others.

Hobbies are uninteresting

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It links with feeling depressed and overwhelmed: the hobbies you once loved, drawing, knitting, dancing, are becoming redundant. You haven't had any time to do them when someone else wasn't with you. You need a moment alone so you can get back to spending time with yourself, doing what you love.

Feelings of lack of control

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Theresa flipped the table because she couldn't control her emotions, and you have never related with a housewife more. When our patience is wearing thin and we feel as though we're going to snap, potentially saying or doing something we can't take back, it means we need to reset ourselves, alone.

You feel trapped in your life

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You've never felt this way before and it's a scary feeling. You have lost control, you are overwhelmed and irritated by your loved ones, and you feel there's no escape. This is a surefire sign to let you know that you need to reconvene with yourself, walk away and reflect on how happy you really are, and that this is just a tough time you can absolutely get through.

Resenting your significant other

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He's always around. He feels as though he lives in your back pocket and even when he's at work, he's messaging you constantly or calling you. You love that he loves you but there's no boundaries for alone time, and that's when the resentment builds up. Have a conversation and consider that some me-time is needed for you to feel fulfilled.

Struggles with identity

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When we feel trapped and as though we are living our lives purely for other people, we can struggle to keep up with who we are as individual people. If we're constantly around our kids or our partners, we forget that we're not just mothers and wives, but actual women who need time to develop, work on and enjoy ourselves.

Life feels uncomfortable

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When all of these signs accumulate into a huge feeling of discomfort and anger, it can lead to longer issues further down the line. You need to take a minute and consider if continuing to put yourself under this kind of pressure is helping you in the long run (spoiler: it's not), and then you need to rest alone and look after yourself.

Desperate for change

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We've all done it: you feel as though you're losing control, nothing is right and you don't know how to fix it, so you turn to the scissors and the at home dye kit and hope for the best. Don't do it! Don't get the bangs! Sit down with yourself and re-prioritise your life so that you are at the top. You deserve better than a perm in 2023!

You are never alone

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When you are never alone, you become a different person, one that doesn't know how to look after herself. But remember, that you are also not alone in that other people go through this too. There is plenty of advice on how to cope when you're under all this pressure and stress, and that you should and are the number one priority.