Signs That You And Your Partner Share a Love Language

What is a Love language?

Source: Cario West MagazineLove is love. Right? Well yes, but we all feel, experience and therefore show love in different ways. We're going to take you though the 5 ways we feel and show love, also known as "love languages," and see if yours matches your partner's. If they don't though, don't worry - understanding them will still make a huge difference!

Words of Affirmation

Source: Meme generatorSome of us just love to have love spoken over us or to say/ write/ sing loving things over those we care about. It doesn't matter how we express it, if we want you to feel our affection, we'll communicate it (often verbally, but also written.) When people with this love language receive words of encouragement, affection or love, it will go deep.

You go big on compliments

Source: Radio TimesIt probably doesn't need saying, but we (and this type) will say it any way, but if you both share this love language, you'll really enjoy a good compliment, even if and maybe especially in front of others. You'll also both love to point out each other's strengths and offer lots of encouragement.

You're both empaths

Source: WikihowThose who feel and express love in this way are often really good at speaking from the heart and expressing empathy. They don't just fire around meaningless niceties, they mean what they say and understand that it has impact. Encouraging words will often be tailored to a situation with ease, showing you really do know each other.

You like to feel appreciated

Source: Makeameme.orgIf you're both this love language, you'll like to hear, a lot, that your partner notices and appreciates things you are and do. Even if it's the small things, like doing the dishes vacuuming. Make sure you take time to say "I love you" too, as you both will love to hear it!

Written words count too

Source: LoveToKnowDon't under-estimate, in all the verbal compliments and encouragement, that you'll both really appreciate a written note of love too. You can go big here, as there is less chance they might feel embarrassed in front of others (unless you pin it their work notice board. Maybe don't do that.)

Acts of Service

Source: meme-arsenal.comThis sounds a bit derogatory maybe, but it shouldn't. Plenty of people feel most loved when someone does something nice for, or serves them. They will in turn seek to act out their feelings for others by doing things for them, even if it's not grand gestures.

It's the small things

Source: iStockSo, if neither of you are into being showy about how you feel, but would rather do something small, practical and caring, then this is probably the love language for you! Maybe you both like to pick up trash, top up drinks without being asked, make the bed etc... oh boy do we envy your home.

Similar upbringings maybe?

Source: Civil EatsThe root of most, but partially this love language, can be found in our childhoods. So, if you both find doing practical things for people is the most natural way for you to demonstrate your affection, chances are you had a parent who liked to do things like that for you: cooking fav food or carefully putting away your best clothes etc.

Without asking

Source: Wordpress.com: Keeping Up With The HolsbysThis is also perhaps the easiest love language to miss if one of you doesn't speak it, but if you do, you'll notice the effort behind the menial more easily. Maybe you find you feel loved when your partner does your ironing or unpacks your suitcase without you staying anything, just so you don't have to? These things could be overlooked by someone who prefers Quality Time for example.

Matching here is probably a good thing

Source: Yahoo Movies UKIt's pretty easy to get hurt if this is your love language and you're not uuuuber self-aware. If you expect your partner to do those little things to show you they care and they don't, you might then assume, then, that they don't care. However, it's more likely that it's just not on their radar. If you are both service people though, it's a dream!

Receiving Gifts

Source: Her CampusAn obvious one maybe (unless it really isn't your love language!) The key point here is, people with this love language appreciate meaningful, thoughtful gifts; the price tag doesn't matter. Also, what constitutes a "gift" may vary from person to person. However, when they receive a tangible token of love, it will impact these people, deeply.

It's not being greedy

Source: TV JokesYou may both have the feeling in common that others see you as a bit materialistic or maybe even greedy. This is not the case! With people with this love language, it's always the thought, not the cost, which counts. So, if you both love sending and receiving flowers for instance "just because", even if you picked them yourself, it's the thought you love, not the thing per say.

Food glorious food

Source: SomeecardsOne thing you may both particularly both enjoy if you share this love language, is choosing and giving a favourite food, drink or maybe even a gift certificate for a restaurant you know they'll love. Here again, it's all about expressing how much you know the person by physically giving them something you know they'll enjoy.

You both love surprises

Source: The Trend SpotterNot everyone does, but if surprises are your thing, chances are, this is your, or one of your, love languages. Again, it's the thought behind the surprise that really counts, and you love that the person doing the surprising went to all that effort to make you feel special.

But the big things matter too

Source: YouTubeLet's face it, receiving the ideal birthday or Christmas gift is going to make anyone feel special but even more so if this is your love language! Especially if your partner buys you something you mentioned ages ago - it'll really make you feel listened to and cherished. Like when Ross bought Rachel that pin - you know? If you're both big b-day people, that's a big hint!

Quality Time

Source: cheezburger.comIt's pretty self explanatory this one, but those who speak this love language crave “fruitful and attentive time” with their loved ones. Chilling the sofa, scrolling through Instagram, even if you have your arm around them, doesn't count. We're talking undivided attention here.

Eye contact? No problem

Source: Make a memeThis can be quite a hard love language to assign to people; after all, we all like spending time with people we love, right? One helpful hint may be if neither of you feel uncomfortable with eye contact or what's called "reciprocal communication." This is often non-verbal communication which deepens both your understanding of a situation.

You WILL make it happen

Source: Verywell MindIf you're both the type of people who will go out of their way to make sure that quality time happens with those you care about - this is the love language for you. You will move heaven and earth to keep that coffee date, the FOMO on a meaningful moment is real!

Ditch the distractions

Source: EtsyYou'll be pretty aware of this if this is your language, but make sure you try and limit possible distractions if you're in the "quality time zone." Cell phones away people, and let's switch Netflix off for a bit - it'll be worth it. You'll both know the sadness which comes from wasted time together.

Some ideas

Source: Dreamstime.comYou both love date night! It can be pretty hard, once you've spent a good chunk of time together to come up with different things to do during your quality time. Here's a couple we liked the sound of: planning a stay-cation together; finding a new hobby or community college class; volunteering together; cooking together but you can only use what you already have in...

Physical Touch

Source: Elite DailyIt's very easy to tell who our touchy feely friends are and those who would almost rather you slapped them than hugged them. However, physical tough as a love language tends to be more subtle than just being "huggy." It's also not all about sex, non-intimate touch is important too.

It's a pretty obvious one

Source: zikoko.comHaving said that, your mates will probably be able to tell you if you're both this love language! Is it weird to sit together and not be touching in some way? Do you have 0 problem with PDA? Do you love a spontaneous kiss on the forehead or arm around you? This is you!

You don't need words so much

Source: Metro UKSure, it's nice to say and hear "I love you," but if this is you, you won't need to hear it so much, so long as you're being regularly, physically affirmed in that department. The way someone holds or kisses you can tell you just as much as their words - this is where it's helpful to both be on the same page!

It's not all about sex, however...

Source: EurogamerNon-intimate touch is vital to both of you, however having your partner initiate sex will make you feel super loved. We're talking about in a committed relationship here of course, and beware, if touch is your thing, you may find yourself a bit vulnerable here in other settings. If you're both on the same page on this one though... woohoo!

Don't miss the small things

Source: torontopubliclibrarySure, we all love a good smooch, but physical touch is so much more than that. Simple ways to monopolise on this being your couple love language are: a quick peck good-bye; hold their hand while they talk; brush their hair out of their face; cuddle (lots); if they're stressed, a massage will do them wonders.

Know your partner

Source: HealthlineLuckily, this isn't a guessing game; talking about this stuff can be really helpful in a relationship. Of course observing how your partner reacts to being cooked a lovely meal or snuggled into during a movie might give you some clues, but talking about love languages can be a real game changer for some couples. If you discover you're the same one - bonus!

Get deep

Source: The Daily CougarThis is not just a throw away technique to give your relationship a boost, mind. Jay Shetty, an expert in these matters, reflected: “Gifts don't just mean physical objects. Touch doesn't just mean a handshake or walking and holding hands. Words of affirmations doesn't just mean throwing around words, right? It's so much more than that.” It's about really knowing the heart of your loved one and letting that knowledge impact the way you live alongside them.

Speak their language...

Source: StylistEven if, on paper, you have the same love language, it may look different for both of you. This takes a bit of practise but it's so worth it. Preferring the needs of your partner is one of the keys to a happy relationship, so long as you both do it in equal measure. It's about them, after all.

We're super happy for you!

Source: The GuardianIf you speak the same love language as your partner, that's fab, we're super happy for you. We hope you can use your newly discovered knowledge to really lean into how you express your love. If you don't, that's great too! The point is, relationships are a journey, and knowing theses things about each other will only make you more connected and make it clearer to you how to best love each other.