20 Bizarre Rules That All Teachers Must Follow

1. The only drink that makes you live... forbidden

Image Source: Reddit

This is blatantly barbaric. A teacher shared that the head of the school where they had previously worked had banned coffee from the building. Coffee! The reasoning behind this outrageous prohibition? If the children couldn't have it, neither could the teachers.

2. No soda

Image Source: Reddit

Another teacher said their principal was fine with coffee but drew the line at soda, claiming it was forbidden because students might turn into fizzy monsters. Well, I guess we wouldn't want them bursting with creativity during class! He had to drink his Diet Coke in the morning; imagine that! Nothing like the refreshing taste of carbonation to kickstart a day of molding young minds!

3. Watch how you drink that water!

Image Source: Reddit

Even worse, some principals don't make school rules about what you drink, but how you drink it! It's fascinating how a mere computer mishap can transform a school's stance on hydration methods. Because clearly, the taste of water depends entirely on the shape and size of the container it's held in. Forget about the laws of physics; it's all about the mug's aura and its impact on the water's essence!

4. The Late Book

Image Source: Reddit

Ah, the delightful spectacle of the LATE BOOK, where tardiness is met with a healthy dose of shame and a splash of humor. Picture the scene: the sign-in book is whisked away at 7 a.m., and in its place emerges the dreaded LATE BOOK, ready to record the tales of delayed arrivals and creative excuses. One teacher wrote, "having sex with my husband" as the reason for their late arrival. Clever, no?

5. Now we're asking stupid questions

Image Source: Reddit

Just when you thought tardiness couldn't get any more dramatic, we witness the spectacle of an angry interrogation in the cafeteria right in front of your innocent students. According to a teacher, the principal asked them while talking to a parent and again in front of the students what time they went to bed the night before because they were a bit late. Now, imagine that happening to you!

6. Not one inch further

Image Source: Reddit

Who would have thought that parking perfection would be a crucial skill for academic success? I guess those parallel parking exams in driver's ed finally have a purpose. In this school, the principal made it a rule to park the car perfectly. Did you think that was all? Noooo! He also measured each day how far the vehicle was from the lines and send nastygrams to those failing this crucial life skill.

7. Sign in every morning

Image Source: Reddit

What's surprising in this time and age is that so many schools require their educators to sign in at the office as soon as they arrive in the morning. This, my dear friends, births a totally new set of issues. For instance, a teacher said that they arrived well before the admin and had to interrupt their class to go to the office and sign in after the person in charge got there. Some people's dedication to the bureaucratic rituals of education knows no bounds!

8. Dehydration to the maximum

Image Source: Reddit

Did we just say that the rule on how you drink water was sacrilegious? Well, those teachers are actually lucky because they can actually drink something. But there are schools that forbid educators and students from drinking anything in the classroom. Now, imagine that kind of dehydration! We wonder if a parent thought to sue that principal. I would have.

9. Scheduled emergencies

Image Source: Reddit

Tired yet? There's a school that wants teachers to prepare for emergencies. Imagine that! One educator had to leave to pick up their injured kid, but they secured coverage for the class before leaving. However, the principal told them and all the other teachers the next day that emergencies had to be announced and approved 24 hours in advance. Think about what kind of people run our schools.

10. On the dot

Image Source: Reddit

On to the morning meetings. At this school, staff had to be in the conference room at 7:30 am on the dot; otherwise, they would not be allowed to participate: the headmaster would close and lock the door and then laugh at the educators who didn't make it run across the campus.

11. Backing into parking spots only

Image Source: Reddit

Backing into parking spots — the ultimate test of multitasking skills and rearview mirror acrobatics. At this school, the headmaster asked all the teachers to back into their spots. Like they needed another challenge for the day! But fear not, brave educators, for this is merely a subtle initiation ritual into the exclusive club of "Teaching on Hard Mode."

12. Say hello to my little friend

Image Source: Reddit

One other school had a rule in place that required teachers to stop by the principal's office and say hello, every morning, even when the headmaster was late! Clearly, the success of our educational institutions rests on the timely exchange of morning pleasantries, especially when you have a classroom full of eager young minds waiting for their dose of knowledge!

13. Toxic positivity

Image Source: Reddit

We are all aware of the power of optimism. However, toxic optimism, which entails ignoring any unpleasant feelings or constructive criticism, can lead to resentment and alienation. Take it from this teacher who shared that the superintendent refused to let the teachers have a lounge or workroom because "Teachers just go in there to gossip." This is toxic positivity to a new level.

14. Clapping only once

Image Source: Bergen Mama

We all agree that meetings should be brief, but this seems a tad excessive: During this particular school's staff meetings, the principal insisted that they could only applaud once, as opposed to clapping their hands repeatedly. Like normal people. She claimed that applauding was a time waster. Well, that's a bizarre rule!

15. No after-work hours

Image Source: Reddit

The day is never long enough, right? That's just too bad! At this school, the principal warned a teacher that if they didn't stop working in their classroom on the weekends to catch up, they would be reported to the district. Where is this school where working after hours is forbidden? Asking for a friend.

16. Sanitizer out!

Image Source: Reddit

This school took away all the sanitizer in the whole building because... it is flammable. This is the great hand sanitizer conundrum, where the quest for cleanliness collides with the fear of spontaneous combustion! This educator dared to challenge the headmaster by saying the matches (that children were allowed to carry on them) were even more dangerous, but to no avail.

17. No talking in the parking lot

Image Source: Reddit

At this school, the principal forbid the teachers to talk to each other in the parking lot! Wanna hear the reason behind this stupid stupid rule? She was afraid people would think they talked about her! I can just picture the parking lot police, armed with their rulebooks and walkie-talkies, ready to pounce on any unsuspecting teacher caught engaging in forbidden parking lot banter.

18. No parking lot at all!

Image Source: Reddit

It cannot get worse than that, can it? Well, we assure you that it can: This other school had no parking lot! But hey, who needs the convenience of a parking lot when you can embark on a quest to find the perfect street spot, all while skillfully juggling quarters and dimes to feed the insatiable parking meters?

19. Cleanliness is not important

Image Source: Reddit

Imagine the perplexing world of kindergarten hygiene protocols, where soap becomes a forbidden fruit, lest the innocent little ones succumb to its irresistible taste. Seriously now, this school had a no-soap rule in place! It would have been easier and more cleanliness-promoting if the headmaster would have had the brilliant idea to simply host an intervention with the parents of the children (and the children) who were eating soap.

20. An yearly fee for the copy materials

Image Source: Reddit

At this school, generosity knows no bounds in the realm of copier budgets! The principal had a rule: $20 per teacher per year for the glorious pursuit of copying materials. Surely, with such a princely sum, teachers can print their educational wonders with reckless abandon and a bottomless inkwell.

21. No unpaid hours

Image Source: Reddit

"I had a principal yell at me for putting in too many (unpaid) evening hours," shared an educator. According to the teacher, they ran a carnival the day after that was really successful. The hours they spent working went to students who volunteered to create and build games for younger kids. Well, we kinda think learning isn't allowed either these days!

22. The magical pay gateway

Image Source: Reddit

Apparently, signing in has evolved from a mere bureaucratic formality to a magical gateway that determines whether or not a teacher gets paid for the day. This institution made sure to not pay the teachers who did not sign in every morning. We're pretty sure this is illegal.

23. Paper towel monitoring

Image Source: Reddit

Another principal is said to have kept an eye on how often paper towels were used in the staff restroom next to her office. She would berate someone for wasting paper if she heard them "pumping" the towels in the dispenser more than twice. This teacher started using the student restrooms because she was so sick of this nonsense.

24. No need for a copy machine

Image Source: Reddit

This district's headmaster didn't see the need for a copy machine in the school. Gone are the days of carefree copying, where teachers could reproduce worksheets and handouts without the burden of justification. Now, they must embark on a quest to prove the worthiness of each precious copy, as if the fate of the educational universe hinges on the legitimacy of those ink-stained papers.

25. A qualified assistant for the laminator

Image Source: Reddit

The laminator comes next. Many teachers in this institute said that they need to delegate all laminating duties to a qualified assistant. That sounds good, but what if the assistant's schedule is erratic? And guess what! It is. allegedly, the staff would always have to run across campus at the most inopportune moments to get their materials laminated.

26. Only positive feedback

Image Source: The Texas Tribune

This district only allowed teachers to give positive feedback. No matter how a student did on an exam, they were basically asked to only see the good stuff in there. They created a world where concerns, queries, and constructive dialogue must be masked behind a veil of unwavering positivity.

27. US news presenters clone

Image Source: YouTube

Be prepared for one of the wackiest classroom regulations we've ever heard: Each instructor in a grade level was required to teach the same subject at the same time. Like how the news in the country are redacted: each presenter says the exact same thing, more or less at the exact same time. The idea was that if students needed to be moved, they should enter the classroom where they left off.

28. Hide-and-seek

Image Source: Reddit

This other teacher shares their story with the sign-in rule that apparently so many schools still have! It's truly a sight to behold when you stroll into school an hour early, expecting to dutifully sign in, only to be greeted with an exasperated "Come back later; it's not ready." Such a delightful game of hide-and-seek with the sign-in sheet, but not so delightful when the principal marks you late... after you return later.

29. Laminating contract

Image Source: Reddit

This teacher's assistant would always ask them why they needed to laminate their materials, and the rule was to ensure that they would use the item for at least three years. Me? I want to know if you have to use your own blood to sign the laminating contract or if you can use the blood of a sacrificial animal instead. This is bonkers.

30. Pretend you don't see bad behavior

Image Source: Reddit

When school resumes in the fall, all children require a period of transition, but how long should that period last? Teachers at one school are not permitted to issue suspensions or write any disciplinary referrals prior to Christmas. As a result, by Halloween, the kids, not the teachers, are in charge of the whole school. So much for actions having consequences.

31. Teacher confessions you need to hear! The nice kids might get better marks

image source: reddit.com

You know what they say: kindness costs nothing. But if you aren't being kind to your teachers, it could cost you a higher grade... You might think teachers have to do their jobs no matter what - not like being nice your fast food worker just in case they decide to 'accidentally' drop your order on the floor - but actually, how you treat them might affect how generous they are with some grades. One teacher admits that they're more likely to be a lot more strict while grading the paper of a student who's been a huge thorn in their side the entire term!

32. Some teachers f*rt on purpose

image source: reddit.com

Hey, teachers are human just like the kids in the school - and just like kids who might be trying to hold certain bodily functions in during quiet classroom time, you best believe teachers are trying to do the same thing! Most of the time, at least... Because this teacher confesses that during an exam - you know, that time that's the most quiet of them all, when a student really needs to focus - they'll purposefully toot when walking by their desk. Worse - if the student reacts to it, they'll just stare them down with a look as though they don't know what they've done!

33. They don't have patience for kids who don't speak up

image source: reddit.com

How many of us have been in that situation where we ask someone to repeat something they've said three times to the point where we just have to nod and pretend we've heard them? It's like a three strikes and you're out rule. Well, teachers have that with students, too. If a student is saying something to the teacher and then have to ask them to repeat it a million times, they'll pretend they've heard and move on - because they don't have the time or patience to wait for a kid to speak more loudly or more clearly! Yikes. We get it though, time is precious.

34. They probably aren't listening during after school meetings

image source: lexfellowship.com

Teachers confessions don't just amount to their time spent with students, either. One teacher confessed that if they have yet another team meeting, and if that meeting happens at a time when it's most definitely past home time like after 5pm, the chances are they're definitely not listening to a word that's being said. Nodding along, faking a smile and thinking about what they're having for dinner later is about as productive as they're going to be in that meeting! Who can blame them, when they have so many meetings in a week!

35. They might have embarrassing clothing mishaps...

image source: reddit.com

Whether you're an adult, or whether you remember it happening when you were a kid, there had to be a moment when you put a shirt on backwards or inside out, and didn't realize until you were out in public! For teachers, that sort of thing happens too - but it can be a little more embarrassing. One anonymous teacher confession said that they realized half way through a lesson that yesterday's pair of underwear was actually trapped inside their trousers - and all they could think about the rest of the lesson was trying to make sure they didn't fall down the trouser leg and out onto the floor...

36. They prefer meetings with parents over Zoom rather than in person

image source: reddit.com

When you were a kid, one thing you definitely didn't look forward to was teacher-parent meetings. And if you're a parent, you probably think you can do without them sometimes after a busy work day, too! Well, turns out teachers share that sentiment, which is why one admitted that they much prefer the distance meeting with parents over a Zoom call rather than them coming into the school in person. And the reason? Well, for this teacher, it was so they could drink a glass of wine while giving the meetings, and hiding their glass out of view...

37. Some teachers phone in pretending to be sick, too

image source: reddit.com

We've all been there - phoning in pretending to be sick because we just need one day not to be an adult and face up to responsibilities. And in this day and age, 'me days' just to take care of yourself should absolutely be a thing, no explanation needed. For teachers, it's a bit more difficult if you're letting down a classroom of kids - but hey, that's what subs are for. At least that's what this teacher thought, when they admitted they phone in sick a lot just for having 'me days' (watching Netflix, eating and drinking) and don't even feel guilty about it when they go back into work.

38. Permanent records actually exist - and teachers look at them

image source: reddit.com

We've all heard that threat of 'It'll go on your permanent record!'. You might think it's just some urban legend and that nobody ever actually looks at those things to decide on the fate of your future. Well, according to teachers... they are actually a thing, they're very very detailed, and teachers do look at them! Worse, they might actually change their opinion of you if they've seen you did something questionable earlier on your record. This teacher admitted that they might treat a student differently if they've seen behavior problems in the past.

39. Teachers are aware that kids who need extra support aren't getting it

image source: reddit.com

We all know that teachers and the education system faces a lot of problems - not least teacher shortages. You might be wondering what teachers themselves think about that. Well, one confessed that the administration staff seem to put more priority on just getting kids passed than actually helping them or pushing them on a personal level with skills they might need. They also commented that a lot of kids are just put in normal classes when they need special attention from separate classroom environments. Due to teacher shortages, a lot of kids just aren't getting the education focus they need.

40. Some teachers are asked to teach lessons without any warning

image source: reddit.com

When you rock up to a new class as a student, you might naturally assume the teacher standing at the front is the one qualified for that subject, loves that subject and that it's been year's in the planning for them to stand in front of you today! But nope. Some teachers - in higher education, based on this one confession - get shoved into a class on the very first day of it, with barely a minute's warning. It could be a last minute switch up with the faculty, so some teachers might be put in a class they've never even taught before.

41. The truth about all their 'time off'

image source: reddit.com

One thing a lot of non-teachers say about this particular profession is they get a ton of time off, particularly those back to back weeks over the summer! And paid vacation, at that. But according to teachers themselves, it's not all it's cracked up to be. It's not a 12 month salary that includes a huge amount of time off - it's a 9 month salary spread over a year. So technically, no, they're not paid for that huge summer vacation! Not only that, but all that time you think they're spending 'off' work is not really the case - they still have to work over their time off to plan lessons and go to training courses.

42. Parents can affect their kid's grades, too

image source: reddit.com

We mentioned before about one teacher marking their kid up or down depending on how much of a pain they've been all year. But turns out that can also count for how much of a pain a kid's parents are, too! Which doesn't seem fair, but apparently it's a factor! If a kid has been lazy all year and their parents have been incorporative about it when you bring it up with them, and made the teacher's job harder than it should be, it's highly likely that teacher is going to put the exact mark they kid gets for the test. Nice parents and kids who have tried - they'll likely round it up to a higher mark.

43. Teachers going for 'tenure' may be giving less attention to their classes

image source: reddit.com

University professors often get the opportunity for tenure, which is when they get a permanent job as a teacher. Professors who are elected to be on tenure track might actually be neglecting classroom teaching, though... According to one teacher's confession, a professor going for tenure is working on a million different things, including research for their field, having to attend conferences, and pretty much working over 60 hours a week. What that can mean is that teaching students is actually low on their priority list... Ouch.

44. School counselors know more than you think...

image source: reddit.com

So when you're thinking of what teachers know of students, you may forget about the school counselors - who actually know of a whole lot more! One confession from a counselor in high school says they know pretty much everything about a kid's home life, and their parents... including what their parents like to get up to at home, and any bad habits. This makes it more awkward if the parents have to meet with the counselor. And then if they're rude to them? You best believe the counselor is going to make it difficult for the child to get the class they want!

45. No judgements for young children!

image source: reddit.com

This one is actually a nice confession (for a change!). Teachers of young children, like kids going to school for the very first time, are actually happy to keep parents updated through the day, especially with photos. Parents who actually ask for that will be prioritized. Not only that, but teachers are going to judge less than you think - like, not at all - for what your kid wears to school when they're still young. So if you're a parent thinking their kid has to be dressed up in the best brand clothes, think again - teachers know all too well the mess kids can make in early years classes, so they'd rather they come in less expensive clothes!

46. Hygiene and heat conditions can be awful

image source: reddit.com

The sanitary conditions and temperature controls in schools are actually worse than you might think, according to this teacher. We'd like to think schools are one of the most sanitary places on earth, but of course they're not - but even so, they can be even worse than you're imagining. Some schools don't have air conditioning, making teachers and students work in boiling temperatures, and cleaning schedules can often be done with minimal effort. We're talking cafeteria tables being the most disgusting things you've ever seen!

47. Passing can depend more on assignments than the test itself

image source: reddit.com

Every student goes through school thinking that final test grade is the one that's going to make all the difference - at least, that's what students panic about the most when it comes to exam time. But according to this teacher, your assignment work counts for a huge part of it - and teachers will take into account how hard you've tried, regardless of the end test school. If you're been working your behind off all year on your assignments and do awful on your test score, they'll still pass you if you did the assignments. Don't try hard on your assignments all year and do bad on your test score? A bit worse. But mostly, teachers will do everything they can to make sure you pass! Because it looks bad on them if you don't...

48. Parents can actually ruin a lot for their kids

image source: huffpost.com

It's actually sad how much a parent can affect the way teachers perceive their kid, even if their kid hasn't done anything wrong! Apparently you will get a reputation around school with the teachers as 'the kid with the really annoying parents'. If your parent is a very, very annoying, awkward, interfering person - or anything in between - the teachers are going to tell each other, they're all going to know about it, and eventually nobody is really going to want the kid in question in their class just in case they have to deal with that parent...

49. The smartest kids are the ones who cheat

image source: reddit.com

The stereotype of kids at school is often the most intelligent, all A-grade student who never, ever cheats because they're too good to do that - then there's the class clown who would willingly cheat, and is known for it. But we've got it all wrong! According to insider information - i.e., a teacher - it's usually the very clever and best behaved students who are most likely to cheat, and often do. Worse - their parents think they're such a model student that they will never believe a teacher when they say their child has cheated!

50. Young kids being able to sing more advanced songs isn't a good thing

image source: reddit.com

On to a little music and literary revelation here - a teacher specifically in the field of early stage literacy has said that those parents who are obsessed with teaching their kids music and songs from a very young age - like proud their 3 year old can sing a song from the 70s with advanced lyrics - are actually going about it the wrong way. Even though a parent might think it shows their child is a genius if they're singing rock ballads instead of nursery rhymes, the nursery rhymes are actually made in a way purposefully to be slow and simple so that growing kids can pick up on the sound patterns. So singing more advanced songs isn't actually doing them any favors!