Things To Know About Each Other Before Moving In Together

Finances - Make Sure You're Both On The Same Page!

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Moving in together is a big step in any relationship, and it is important that both partners have a clear understanding of one another's expectations. One of the most important things to do, is discussing your individual financial situations e.g. income, expenses and debt.

Budget - Have A Clear Understanding Of Who Pays What!

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Linking back to the topic of finances, you should create a joint budget, as well as discuss how expenses will be divided. For example, you may have a joint tenancy agreement (rent), but you decide to split the cost of utilities e.g. gas, electric, water, heating and Wi-Fi.

Household Chores - Share The Load... It's Not All Up To You!

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Household chores can quickly become a source of disagreement among couples, especially if there hasn't been previous discussions surrounding these tasks. Who will be responsible for which chores, and how often will they be done? This division of tasks may stay the same, or you may find it easier to switch responsibilities each week.

Cleaning Habits - Be Aware Of Each Others Before Taking The Next Step

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Cleaning habits vary from person-to-person, and you may have gained a faint understanding of your partner's. However, it is only after you move in together, that you will truly learn/adapt to their cleaning habits. It is important to understand each other's cleanliness preferences, and tidiness expectations.

Sleep Schedules - Link Your Sleep-Wake Cycle!

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Sleep schedules are another area for discussion, as your schedule when you're alone, will differ considerably to when you're with your partner. Are your sleep patterns compatible? Do you have different bedtimes and/or wake-up times? These are things that need proper consideration.

Pets - Yay Or Nay?

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You and your partner may have individual pets, or share the care of one pet. If you do have any pets, it is important to discuss their care, certain responsibilities and if either of you have any allergies (relating to animals). You also need to ensure that you are moving into a location that is 'pet-friendly'.

Decor/Personal Space - Both Parties Should Have A Say!

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Talk about how you want to decorate your shared space, as well as your personal areas. You may share similar taste with your partner, which will make it easier to decorate the shared spaces, especially the bedroom. However, it is important that you can compromise if/when necessary.

Guests - Find A Happy Balance!

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Set boundaries for when, and how often, guests can visit. This includes your family members, shared and personal friends etc. By setting these boundaries, you're allowing you and your partner time to be alone, without jeopardizing your relationships with other people.

Privacy - Create Clear Boundaries!

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Discuss the need for personal time, and boundaries within the shared living spaces. By having this kind of discussion, you're able to set up healthy boundaries within the relationship, and come to understand your partner's wants and needs (on a deeper level).

Work Schedules - Understanding Is A Big Part Of This One!

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Similarly to other schedules you may have, your work schedules will most likely differ from one another. For example, one of you may work from home, whereas the other works nine-to-five, five days a week. Are your work hours compatible, or do they require compromise?

Hobbies/Interests - Do They Aligne?

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You and your partner may share a lot of hobbies and interests, and you're bound to have your own personal interests. Sharing your interests with your partner, is a great way of discussing your passions, and planning how you'll make time for them. This is something that can be integrated into plans for dates etc.

Communication Styles

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Understanding how you both prefer to communicate, will make it much easier to resolve conflicts. One of you may want to resolve the conflict immediately, whereas you may find it easier to wait a few hours, before having a conversation about any potential conflict.

Future Goals

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It is of paramount importance to discuss your long-term goals (shared and personal), and how living together will fit into those plans. This kind of discussion should occur after you've given yourself time to settle into your new home, as it can be quite overwhelming.

Family Dynamics

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Share your family backgrounds, as well as any expectations regarding family involvement. Again, this sort of discussion should occur after you have settled into your new home, as it can be overwhelming and potentially upsetting (dependent on certain situations).

Dietary Preferences

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Dietary preferences are probably something you're already aware of, but it is definitely something that shouldn't be neglected. Are there any dietary restrictions or preferences that you need to consider? This can include certain allergies/intolerances you weren't initially aware of.

Grocery Shopping

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Grocery shopping is definitely one of the more mundane tasks that everyone does, but it should definitely be topic of discussion with your partner. Decide how you will handle grocery shopping, as well as any meal planning that you would like to do. Planning and preparation are key.

Cooking Responsibilities

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Linking back to the last point, is cooking responsibilities. Who will be responsible for cooking, and how often? This is something that may be a shared responsibility, especially if you opt to follow the meal planning route. However, you may find it easier for one of you to cook, and for the other to wash-up after.

Eating Habits

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Eating habits is another key topic of discussion, as your eating schedules may vary from one other. Talk about mealtime routines and expectations e.g. you'll aim to have dinner by six each evening (unless something comes up). You may have one night a week, where you go out for dinner/order take-out.

Organization

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Organization is one of the most important elements of any relationship, and allows you to manage your time effectively. How are you planning on keeping track of important documents, bills and schedules? You may opt for a calendar, planner or set reminders on your phones.

Home Maintenance

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Home maintenance refers to any potential repairs that may need completing, as well as any alterations you wish to make to your new home. Discuss the responsibilities for home repairs, as well as general upkeep. You may find it useful to attempt D.I.Y for certain projects (to keep costs down).

Noise Tolerance

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Understanding each other's tolerance for noise, music and television volume, will ensure that you don't disrupt one another unnecessarily. If your partner wants to watch a certain program/stay up later for a show, you may find it better to watch something in the bedroom.

Temperature Preferences

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Are you both comfortable with the same room temperature? By coming to some form of agreement regarding heating, you're less likely to experience an increase in conflict. It can be useful to invest in extra blankets, and heavier duvets for the winter months.

Bathroom Schedule

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If you move into a location that has one bathroom, it is important that you're able to co-ordinate your bathroom routines (for the morning and the evening). This can help you cut down on wasting water, heating and electricity. These routines should be established early-on.

Health And Wellness

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Health and wellness are another important aspect of any relationship, whether it's your shared or individual health. Discuss your healthcare preferences, and how you will support each other's well-being. Sharing information regarding your healthcare professionals/family doctor is essential.

Childcare

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If you have children, or you're planning on having children, it is important to discuss parenting styles and responsibilities. By setting these in place before a child arrives, you'll find it slightly easier to adapt to parenthood, as well as tackling any obstacles that present themselves.

Social Life

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Talk about your expectations regarding socialising with friends, and maintaining your individual social lives. You may find that you are part of the same friendship group, so planning time separately may be more difficult. However, it is important to spend time with your individual friendship groups as well.

Boundaries With Exes

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You should address any concerns abut contact with ex-partners, as well as setting boundaries in place if/when necessary. This can be a difficult topic of conversation, and should be done when you and your partner are alone (to reduce the risk of exterior interference).

Travel Plans

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Share your travel preferences with your partner, and how you will handle vacations and trips. You may have individual and/or shared trips planned, which will require efficient preparation e.g. keeping passports up-to-date, packing essentials, planning accommodation/travel.

Emergency Contact Information

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Exchange important contact details for emergencies, as this ensures that you're able to contact the correct people if necessary. This is one of the first things that should be done, as you can never be sure of when an emergency may occur. These contacts should be easy to access within your phone as well.

Conflict Resolution

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Discuss how you will handle disagreements, and compromise when necessary. This can be as simple as giving each other some space after an argument, and/or gaining a clear understanding of your partner's preferred style of communication. This is something that is learnt, and improved upon overtime.