1. We Have Eyes At the Back Of Our Heads
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This famous phrase is one mainly for the students. Every student has experienced this phrase during school. It is often said after a student gets caught doing something they shouldn't be when they think the teacher isn't looking, so once they are caught this phrase is usually said.
2. That Thing On The Ceiling Is A Camera For All Us Teachers To See
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For this one, the teachers will say that any sort of object on the ceiling is a camera that all other teachers are monitoring the classes behaviour on, when in reality it is just a Wi-Fi box, a motion detector or a sprinkler. Again, this a phrase that is mainly used for the students.
3. Everyone Says This Is The Best Behaved Class, So The Principle Is Coming To Look For Themselves
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This phrase is a favourite for teachers when they know they have the head teacher coming to inspect their class. Calling the class, the best behaved even if they aren't right before the head teacher comes in always seems to make the class behave perfectly during that lesson.
4. An Ice Pack Will Make It Better
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This one is a classic when it comes to teachers lying. Every single time without fail, a teacher will give out an ice pack to a student that has fallen over or hurt themselves. Whether it's a bang on the head or the leg, the ice pack always does the job according to teachers.
5. I Hear Everything
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Another classic for teachers, when a student is talking over them this phrase always seems to come out. Even if the teacher cannot hear what exactly is being said they will claim that they can. It seems like being a teacher blesses you with super vison and super hearing.
6. I Don't Have Favourite Students
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Every teacher has said the phrase ''I don't have favourites'' before but let's be honest we all know teachers have them students who are their favourites and have the others that they don't really like to teach. Teachers don't try and hide the fact they have favourites but always say they don't.
7. The Tests Will Be Marked By Tomorrow
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Every time students complete an exam; the teacher collects the papers in at the end and always say that the paper will be marked and graded by tomorrow when we all know that is not true and the papers are not marked for at least a week and the teachers always have the same excuse; ''I have a lot of papers to get through''.
8. Your Child Is So Smart
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This one is more for the parents. During a parents evening or a conversation with parents, teachers always pull out the phrase ''your child is so smart''. Teachers do not believe that every student is smart but to avoid a conflict with parents they tell them that they are so smart.
9. This Will Go On A Permanent Record
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Another classic lie that teachers say to both students and parents. Every time a student misbehaves in school, the teacher always makes the threat of the incident going on a permanent record when in fact they just say this to make the student behave better in the future.
10. Your Child Is Doing Great
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Another phrase for the parents during conversations with teachers. Teachers will always say that the child is doing great in lessons even if they aren't as they believe it is the best way to handle a bad situation. This makes parents believe their child is doing well in school even if they are not.
11. Regular Testing Works
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Teachers do not get a choice of what they have to teach. They told when to teach and when to test and they have to do the testing often and they also tell a lie saying that regular testing is the best way to find out students academical abilities even when most teachers disagree.
12. Your Child Can Be Anything They Want When They Grow Up
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Although students are taught that they can be anything they want when they grow up, teachers have a pretty good idea of what career paths are achievable for students. Teachers will tell parents that their child be anything they want, but if a child wants to be a mathematician but is failing algebra then maybe they can't be anything they want.
13. I Love My Job
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This is a classic phrase that teachers use all the time when parents or students ask them what they think of their job. All teachers say that they love and enjoy teaching when in reality, most of them do not like it that much and are as excited as the students to hear to home time bell.
14. Your Child Can Easily Pass
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Teachers will always pull out this phrase when it comes to talking to parents about a student's grades. They will always say to parents that their child has the ability and will easily pass and get the grade they want even though the teacher knows that some students will not pass.
15. The Homework Should Only Take 20 Minutes Or So
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When a teacher hands out homework, they always say that the homework will take a short amount of time to complete. For example, they will say this maths homework should take no longer than 20 minutes, when they know full well that it will take a lot longer to complete a full paper of maths calculations.
16. Your Child Has So Much Potential They Just Need To Apply Themselves
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Another classic phrase used by so many teachers when talking to a parent. When a student is getting low grades, the teacher will always tell the parent that their child has so much potential and just is not applying it in school. Teachers say this to try and find a silver lining in a bad situation.
17. All That Matter Is They Try Their Best
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Anytime a teacher complements how hard a student is working even though they are not getting good grades is just the teacher attempting to sugar-coat the bad news in the best way possible. Saying how hard they work does not highlight the real problem of the bad grades.
18. There's Still Time To Improve The Grades
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Sometimes when a student is not performing well in class, there is still time to im prove their grades by the end of the term but in other cases there is not enough time and teachers still like to say to parents that there is time. Teachers will lie to parents to put a positive spin on the bad situation.
19. Your Child Is Very Special
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When it comes to talking with parents about their child, teachers will everything they can to make sure every student and their parents know how unique and special they are even if it means lying to them and their parents about how ''special'' the student really is. Teachers just love to lie.
20. Yes I Remember Your Child
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Teachers see hundreds of students per day or even more throughout their lifetime so the chance of them remembering every single student is very small. When teachers run into parents in a supermarket or another public place, they tend to lie about remembering the parents' child and just go along with the conversation.
21. You Are My Favourite Class
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This phrase is for the students as when they decide to ask a teacher what their favourite class to teach is, they always have the same response ''You're my favourite class to teach'' and this is usually a lie. Teachers mainly just say this to end that conversation as they do not like discussing favourites.
22. If You Keep Behaving Like This I Will Ring Your Parents
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This is a classic phrase that teachers use when a student is misbehaving during a lesson. The teacher will not actually ring your parents if you carry on, they just threaten the student to make them behave for the rest of the lesson and most of the time this little lie works.
23. Don't Make Me Get The Principle In Here
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Teachers love to use this phrase when their class is misbehaving or not doing things up to the standard of the teacher. The teacher will threaten the class that she will go and get the principle to come into the class and tell them off, but teachers only do this to make the class behave.
24. Everything I Say Will Be On The Exam
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Teachers really do believe that every word they say will be on the exam when in reality only about half of the things they teach will come up on the exam. Teachers like to use this lie to ensure that all of the students in their class listen to everything they are saying during lesson.
25. I Am Looking Forward To Read Your Essays
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Every time a teacher hands out an essay to the students, they always say that they are looking forward to reading these amazing essays when they are finished. This is a definite lie, teachers do not want to go home and read through a whole class's essays, I am sure they would rather be doing something else.
26. You Have A Great Future Ahead Of You
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Every teacher says this phrase to every student they teach. Even if they teach a student that is failing everything, they will still say that they have a great future lying ahead of them. Teachers do actually believe if for a small number of students but for a lot of them they do not believe it.
27. I Will Be Able See Who Hasn't Studied For This Test
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Before the start of every test, the teacher will always say that they will be able to tell who has studied for the test and who hasn't even tried. This is a lie, teachers do not tell who has or hasn't studied for the test, they just mark the paper and hand it back to the student.
28. This Is Not Funny At All
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When a student tells a funny joke or does something funny during lesson, the teacher will always say that it is not funny at all, when in fact they do find it funny they just cannot laugh at it and have to carry on with the lesson. Sometimes the teachers really give away that they are lying by cracking a smile whilst saying it.
29. One Day You Will Remember Me And Be Grateful For My Teaching
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Many teachers will use this phrase at some point in their teaching career. When a class is taking the teachers teaching for granted, they will usually hit them with the phrase ''you will remember me one day and be grateful for the things I did''. Teachers know full well that as soon as students leave school, they will instantly be forgotten.
30 I Will Just Wait For Quiet
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This phrase is a classic for teachers, they will use this every time a class is talking over them. However, this is a lie because they will not wait around for the whole class to be quiet, they will either carry on with the lesson or just hand out work for the students to complete.