Signs Someone Had A Sheltered Childhood

1. They are super naive

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If someone is naive, they lack wisdom, experience and judgment. If they always assume the best without questioning anything or anyone, then it might be a sign that they're naive and sheltered. Unfortunately, you can't take what everyone says at face value and have to learn to see beyond.

2. They ask permission for everything

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Someone who's been sheltered feels like they have to have permission to do things, even if it's something small. This is often a sign of having parents or family members who micro-managed their lives into adulthood. They probably didn't have autonomy over any decisions from friends to food to clothes. A sheltered person feels guilty to make a decision for themselves.

3. They can be either reckless or terrified of taking risks

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Sheltered people can go either way on this one. Some are afraid of failing so they will avoid risk at ANY cost. On the other side of it though, they will take risks out of defiance with no regard to consequences or harm that may come from it. Both have pros and cons, but sheltered people often lack the discernment to know which one to do at which time.

4. They can't be independent adults

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As mentioned, a sheltered person has to ask permission for everything. This doesn't change going into adulthood. It means that most sheltered people have a hard time flourishing as adults in work and socially. It will be challenging for them to make friends or date. There has to be a willingness to unlearn certain habits.

5. They can't understand other people's motivations

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This goes off of being naive, but if you cannot see past someone's "public self," then you may have led a sheltered life. Go beyond just the words someone is saying and try to understand the intention behind them. People who are sheltered have a hard time trusting their own instincts.

6. They are easily embarrassed

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An overprotected child is often embarrassed, because their parents go out of their way to be overbearing, even if they don't realize the effect it's having on their kid. Because of this, as an adult, and over-sheltered person will find themselves feeling embarrassed whenever they do something perceived as wrong or weird.

7. They often feel shut down or stuck

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Because of the raised level of social anxiety, sheltered people often experience the shutting down of emotions. It's quite normal for them to feel exhausted or overwhelmed when experiencing anything from the outside world. Because of this, they will often isolate themselves.

8. They aren't allowed to sleep over

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If a kid is overly sheltered, they likely aren't allowed to participate in sleepovers. While there's obviously some commonsense and understanding to this, the child likely isn't able to participate in many social activities out of fear. It's okay to be cautious, but this prevents the child from learning about other people and having a diverse perspective.

9. They weren't allowed to get their license

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Overprotective parents won't allow their kids to drive out of fear. They end up stunting the kid's development by not allowing them to participate in this perfectly normal social and technical function. If they do get their license, they're likely quite fearful drivers.

10. They lack emotional maturity

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If someone is sheltered, they likely haven't developed the ability to regulate their emotions. This means that they might not behave at the same maturity level as other people their age. If someone has only spent their lives around family, it might be difficult for them to interact with strangers or pick up on social cues.

11. They constantly think people are mad at them

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A sheltered person is always worried about disappointing people. They feel like they're always in trouble and that people are always mad at them. This can lead to a dread of being around people, especially authority figures, because they're afraid anything they do or say will be used against them.

12. They think that life is all rainbows and smiles

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A sheltered person may think that everything in the world is in their favor. If you're moving out of a sheltered lifestyle, know that it's okay to feel a bit overwhelmed in the process. This person has likely been living under a rock and doesn't know how to move away from that. But if you're making the effort, you'll find it may burst your perfect bubble.

13. They don't know who they are

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A sheltered person doesn't have a sense of self. Their entire lives have been dictated for them, so they have no form of self-expression. This means they don't know how to wear what they want, style their hair the way they want, and so much more. Self-expression is a key component to emotional maturity.

14. They never make plans

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This goes beyond not being able to make decisions. A sheltered person probably never makes any sort of social plans, because they are so accustomed to being told no in their life. They lack independence, as mentioned, so they choose not to engage with life.

15. They have a lot of anxiety

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If someone has been overprotected in their life, they may carry a sense of anxiety or paranoia. These kids have been sheltered from the outside world and turn into fretful adults, freaking out at any inconvenience or potential threat. They may only feel safe in their home.

16. They feel trapped

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For a sheltered person, home can feel more like a prison. Home is meant to feel like a safe space of love and protection. But overprotection makes it feel like a prison with a constant walking on eggshells. They may express how much they dislike being at home.

17. They have a deep sense of shame

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Many sheltered people struggle with depression because of the isolation they experience. They may also feel debilitating shame that they've carried since childhood. They were raised to avoid anything "bad," and will feel immense shame if they fail at avoiding them as adults.

18. They listen to everyone else

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A sign of someone being sheltered is that they can't make a life decision for themselves. They have been trained to always look to everyone else for advice, and they also don't have enough informed life experience to make a good decision. Whether it be religious leaders, teachers or family, these people can't form an opinion without their advice.

19. They will have a low self-esteem

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Self-esteem is often developed or demolished during childhood. If someone is sheltered, then they're not able to protect themselves or make choices for themselves. This results in a low self-worth because they don't feel competent when it comes to navigating life. They also can't accomplish things on their own, so there's no sense of achievement.

20. They lack common sense

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If you've been sheltered your whole life, there are probably a lot of things that you haven't heard of or know that your friends do. Most sheltered kids don't focus on much outside of schoolwork. This means that they may be super book smart but not understand how basic common sense works.

21. They may have had their phone calls recorded

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When someone is sheltered by their parents, it's very probable that their phone was monitored at all costs. A lot of overprotective parents spy on their kids and their phone calls by recording them. Some have even been known to monitor keystrokes on the device to maintain ultimate control!

22. They're severely lacking in social skills

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Sheltered people probably experience a high level of social awkwardness. There's also a higher possibility for these people to subscribe to racial stereotypes and be scared to meet anyone outside of their bubble. Any interactions that they don't know have to navigate will cause extreme stress, and they will feel overwhelmed.

23. They aren't allowed to use the internet or watch TV

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There's a difference between being watchful and being controlling. Of course, when a child is young, it makes sense to have guidelines for internet usage. But if a parent is controlling every piece of information they're consuming, it will lead to being a sheltered teenager and adult.

24. They have a rebellious streak

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We've talked about defiance a bit already. But if you notice someone is being super rebellious for seemingly no reason and protesting any authority in front of them, it's possible they've been very sheltered. Studies have shown that these types of negative behaviors are a result of overprotection.

25. They are always in need of help

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A non-sheltered person is open to trying new things on their own. A sheltered person ALWAYS needs help because they're terrified of making a mistake or being wrong. This often stems from a fear of punishment. Perhaps you weren't allowed to bring home bad grades, or they didn't let you take up hobbies, so you depend on others to avoid negative feedback.

26. They're bad at conversation and communication

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Beyond just being socially awkward, conversation is incredibly hard for sheltered people. They aren't able to express their emotions in a way that makes sense to people outside their own families. Perhaps they will simply come across as shy, but they may also try to engage in a confusing way.

27. They don't get cultural references

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Sheltered people are definitely not your go-to for any pop culture references. In fact, it's likely that they would be completely lost in that type of conversation. While no one has seen or listened to EVERY film or music or show out there, sheltered people really wouldn't understand. These phrases have become standard vernacular in a lot of social settings, adding to the anxiety one might feel.

28. They might be very good at lying

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If someone who's sheltered has learned to be defiant, they are likely a good liar. This is a pretty basic sign that their parents have micromanaged their life too much that they feel they have to hide things about themselves to live a different life. Even if they aren't doing something "wrong," they feel the need to lie to protect themselves.

29. Forget about public speaking

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If someone's been sheltered their entire life, as we've mentioned, there's a lack of independence and ownership. This means that public speaking is basically out of the question. Probably the most people they've been around is their own extended family, so even being in a setting with non-family is stressful without the added pressure of speaking publicly.

30. They don't have any coping mechanisms

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Because sheltered people have not been exposed to a lot of difficulty or negative situations, they often can't cope if these things arise. They've often never learned to self-soothe and have always relied on parents or family to get them through life's circumstances. As adults, they will not be able to handle everyday life.