12+ Steps On How To Become A Spy

1. Get the confidence

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The answer is always "yes" you CAN handle it. So if you start to feel nervous just remember you're more than capable of handling whatever is thrown your way. The more confident you feel and act, the more likely things will run smoothly for you. Confidence is key!

2. Get smart & gather intelligence

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You should know a little bit of everything, so when your target says "I just love everything from Picasso's blue period." You know exactly what you should say in reply. Never stumble on your words and if you're worried you don't have enough information try to sustain the conversation for as long as possible.

3. Get creative

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It's in your best interest for you to be equipped with gadgets so that the process of the mission goes as well as possible. Techniques and recommendations can be found further down this page so keep following these steps if you want to find out exactly how to become a spy.

4. Get a day job

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Remember how Clark Kent (Superman for all of you wannabe's out there) had a daily job at the Daily Planet. Well, you should channel your inner Clark Kent....and do a 'real person's' job. It's an automatic go to story and it can be your cover story as well.

5. Make sure you're in shape

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You've never seen an out of shape spy have you? Well, you would need to keep in shape if you're spending your time tailing someone. You need to be able to make a quick getaway as well for when things get sticky - which they inevitably will. This will ensure you're ready for action at anytime.

6. Hide in plain sight

imagesource: theguardian 

Your number one objective is for you to blend in as you're acting like you're just like everybody else. You have to have a wardrobe which allows you to blend in with your surroundings for that day. And if you're out of your 'normal' area, take a camera in your bag and act like a tourist if needs be.

7. Keep things to a minimum

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The less you have on you the less you have to drag around and remember. Never carry too much, always mix your weapons up and learn how to train in martial arts incase you can't get hold of weapons that day. If conflict arises then you know you're fully equipped to protect yourself.

8. Carry on life as normal

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If you're seen to be chilling, at around in the park eating ice cream and just blending in with the general public then who's going to guess you're the spy? Choose to keep your daily activities simple so that if you need to make a quick getaway it doesn't need to get too complicated.

9. Delete yourself from the internet

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Staying incognito from the world doesn't make much sense if you can be found online. If there are any photo albums with you in or blog posts, you need to be in stealth mode in all areas of your life. You can live without Facebook, you can live without it all.

10. Never run in a crowd

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This would get you caught out straight away. If you look like you're trying to get away from a situation, your cover will get blown. Attract as little attention as  possible and always assume that that more people that are looking at you, the less you'll get away with.

11. Don't act or be nervous if you are seen

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Stay cool, calm and collected at all times and it'll get you a long way. You won't arise any suspicions and if you think you're being watched you still need to stay calm. Act as though nothing is happening and wait for the opportunity to leisurely escape the situation.

12. Silence is necessary

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If you're stalking someone then you need to be absolutely silent, don't breathe too deeply, don't wear anything that jingles or makes noises and make sure you can match the sounds of your environment. Scout the area before hand if you can do to ensure a smooth running operation.

13. Get a disguise

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This isn't necessarily mandatory, but it can help in situations. Don't get a disguise too outrageous, but something simple that will slightly alter the way you look - enough that somebody that may be following you, wouldn't recognise you. A wig, a moustache, glasses. Something like that!

14. Start eavesdropping

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Technology can be your best friend in this situation, if you throw in some earphones and pretend to be busy on your phone, the people around you wouldn't assume that you would be listening to them. Blend in with the crowd and make sure that the area isn't too loud that you can't hear.

15. Learn how to lip read

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When the subject is in ear shot but the noises around you are too loud to hear, you need to be able to read lips. This can really help if you're too far from the subject as well, look through some binoculars and lip read. This can be something you can learn to do quite easily.

16. Master the art of lying and detecting lies

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What's the point in gathering so much evidence if you can't even detect if somebody is deceiving you? You need to learn body language as well as you can. In order to find out if someone is lying, you've got to do your research and this can often take years.

17. Learn how to tail someone

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People don't stay still for long, so you need to be sure that you know how to tail someone without getting caught. Always have a backup plan for if you're observed because if someone suspects that you're following them you need to pretend that you're going about your daily business.

18. Steal things without getting caught

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You need to know your surroundings, the suspect may be carrying evidence that could be a useful clue so it's helpful to be able to steal a helpful tool. Try stealing something small to practice and return it without being noticed. Practice makes perfect.

19. Get tech-savvy

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You need to know your surroundings, the suspect may be carrying evidence that could be a useful clue so it's helpful to be able to steal a helpful tool. Try stealing something small to practice and return it without being noticed. Practice makes perfect.

20. Improve your night vision

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Some of the best covert work takes place whilst it's dark. Human vision at night can be extremely poor so if you can get your hands on some night vision goggles to get some of your work done then, then you could get one step ahead. Start working in the dark to get your eyes used to it.

21. Improve your memory

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Keeping your memory quick is one of the most important tools you could possibly have. You need to be sharp and on the ball at all times so playing memory quizzes will make you more observant. If your memory is like a goldfish then get practicing... practice makes perfect!

22. Have locations to meet up with associates sorted

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Be sure not to always be meeting with your associates in the same places, particularly if you think you yourself are being watched. Try to keep it casual, meet in cafes, libraries, restaurants and public spaces like parks. Just remember, cool, calm and collected.

23. Always have a change of clothes on hand in case

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This will allow you to dissolve into a crowd if needs be. Throw on a hat or change your jacket if you need to make a quick exit. Be sure to always wear layers so you can throw them on and off as well. This can be a really useful trick for a quick change.

24. Never carry any form of ID on you

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Never ever carry any form on identification on your and keep in mind that technology and vehicles can also be attached to you. Also never use fake ID that can get you in trouble with the law if you're ever pulled over or arrested for some reason. No one can know who you are at any time!

25. Gather intelligence before going on a mission

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It's always good to research any areas before you visit them so that you're always within your bearings. Learn common routes, scout the areas nearby and get used to people in that area seeing you. You want to blend in and look like you're like anybody else around there.

26. Learn the habits of people who could be spying on you

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If you get yourself used to your target then you'll learn to anticipate their next move. What kind of car they drive, their license plate, who they associate with, what they enjoy doing in their spare time. This could get you ahead of the game. Make sure you always do your research.

27. Be aware of your surroundings at all times

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Learn to think on your feet and fast! You need to be resourceful and always look casual. Practice day to day and find useful ways of quickly hiding, making fast exits or tailing someone without them realise what you're actually doing. It's very important!

28. Always have a backup plan or cover story

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Even the best spies can get caught at times and it's not worth the risk of you failing. If you're ever questions then you want to be prepared. You want the confidence to get yourself off the hook without the person getting suspicious that you're lying.

29. Consider finding partners

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It's always a good idea to get yourself a partner. With a partner you need to establish viewpoints, communication protocol and possible movements and plan B's. You should learn to both be discrete and understand how you both work so anything you do together flows well.

30. NOTE:

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Do not take these points as an endorsement for bad. This article is supposing that you're working on the side of good and not evil and all of these points should be taken lightly. This is just an lighthearted article that shouldn't be taken too seriously.