30 Reasons We Should Never Get Married

1. Autonomy Matters

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In the pursuit of marital harmony, individual aspirations can take a backseat, resulting in a gradual erosion of personal autonomy. Balancing compromise with personal desires becomes complex, potentially dimming the spark of independence that once defined each partner.

2. Financial Strain

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Uniting financial resources might seem logical, but it can unveil differences in money management styles. Debates over discretionary spending, repayment strategies for debts, and long-term financial goals can create tension, impacting both financial stability and emotional well-being.

3. Communication Challenges

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Open dialogue forms the foundation of strong relationships, yet inadequate communication can sow the seeds of discord. When emotions and concerns aren't conveyed clearly, misunderstandings can flourish, nurturing a breeding ground for resentment and discontent.

4. Changing Priorities

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Life is a journey of growth, and aspirations evolve as individuals mature. What seemed harmonious in the past may no longer resonate with present ambitions. Navigating these changes while upholding the sanctity of marriage can be challenging, requiring constant adaptation.

5. Monotony Sets In

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The early thrill of discovering a partner's quirks can gradually give way to predictable routines. While stability is comforting, an excess of it can drain the spontaneity and exhilaration that make relationships exhilarating. The familiar can evolve into the mundane, dampening the zest for shared adventures.

6. Sleep Suffering

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Cuddling might be adorable, but differing sleep schedules and restless nights can chip away at well-being. Sleep deprivation isn't just an inconvenience; it can strain physical health and emotional resilience, affecting the very foundation on which a strong relationship thrives.

7. Social Pressure

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The weight of cultural norms and family expectations can overshadow personal wants. Succumbing to societal pressures to marry can lead to a life that doesn't resonate with true desires, creating an existence centered on appeasing others rather than nurturing personal happiness.

8. Division of Labor

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Domestic responsibilities can morph into battlegrounds if not managed wisely. Disagreements over who does what, when, and how can evolve into simmering resentments, eroding the partnership's foundation. What seems trivial can snowball into significant conflicts, impacting emotional bonds.

9. Unmet Expectations

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Couples often embark on marriage with romanticized ideals that reality might not fulfill. Hoping for a fairytale ending can set the stage for disillusionment, as relationships are multifaceted journeys with highs and lows. Unrealistic anticipations can magnify disappointments when life doesn't mirror fantasies.

10. Legal Entanglements

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What begins with love can potentially end in courtrooms and legal intricacies. Divorce isn't solely an emotional ordeal — it can be financially and legally taxing. Untangling shared assets and determining custody arrangements can lead to stress and enduring emotional wounds.

11. Career Sacrifices

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Juggling professional aspirations with marital duties is an intricate dance. For couples with high-powered careers, finding equilibrium requires sacrifice and compromise. The constant tug between chasing individual dreams and nurturing the partnership can strain even the most committed relationships.

12. Incompatibility Issues

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Initial infatuation can mask fundamental incompatibilities that surface over time. As the honeymoon phase wanes, differences in values, interests, and communication styles might emerge, posing challenges to maintaining a harmonious connection. Such revelations can reshape the very core of the relationship.

13. Parenting Disagreements

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When parents have contrasting approaches to child-rearing, it can result in clashes that affect not only the children but also the relationship itself. Disagreements over discipline, education, and values can escalate, necessitating delicate negotiations to maintain a harmonious family unit.

14. Loss of Alone Time

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Solitude rejuvenates the soul, yet marriage brings constant togetherness. The challenge lies in preserving essential moments of solitude. Escaping the hustle and bustle of daily life becomes complex, requiring conscious efforts to strike a balance between companionship and personal reflection.

15. Health Hazards

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Persistent tensions can seep into well-being, causing stress-induced health problems. The emotional toll of unresolved conflicts can lead to sleep disturbances, compromised immune systems, and elevated anxiety levels. A strained relationship could unwittingly contribute to a decline in overall health.

16. Infidelity Temptation

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Human nature's complexity means resisting temptation can be demanding. Monogamy requires dedication, and some individuals might grapple with desires beyond their commitment. Succumbing to these inclinations risks fracturing trust and spiraling the relationship into turmoil.

17. Personal Growth Stifled

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While prioritizing the relationship is crucial, losing sight of personal aspirations can hinder growth. Neglecting individual dreams for the sake of the partnership might foster resentment and limit personal achievements, ultimately weakening the shared bond.

18. We vs. Me

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Striking the right equilibrium between personal desires and the demands of the relationship is an ongoing challenge. Overemphasizing "we" might lead to suppressing individual identity, while over prioritizing "me" can erode the foundation of unity and mutual support.

19. Comparison Trap

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Comparison can breed discontent. Measuring the worth of one's marriage against external appearances often overlooks the complexities beneath the surface. Focusing on others' seemingly idyllic unions can obscure the unique strengths and merits of your own relationship.

20. Cultural Differences

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When partners hail from diverse cultural backgrounds, conflicts can emerge due to varying values, traditions, and expectations. Bridging the gap between cultures requires empathy, compromise, and a willingness to embrace and respect differences for the relationship to thrive.

21. Loss of Friends

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As priorities shift, the camaraderie of single friends might wane. Couples might gravitate towards peers who share similar life stages, inadvertently distancing themselves from once-close companions. Striking a balance between nurturing both old and new connections becomes a delicate endeavor.

22. Sexual Compatibility

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Intimacy is a cornerstone of marriage, but differing desires and preferences can lead to frustration and disappointment. Navigating the sensitive landscape of sexual compatibility demands open dialogue, empathy, and an unwavering commitment to mutual satisfaction.

23. Home Comforts

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From furniture arrangement to household cleanliness, harmonizing domestic preferences can test patience. Balancing personal comfort with shared spaces requires compromise, communication, and the ability to adapt to the evolving dynamics of cohabitation.

24. Extended Family Drama

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The influence of extended families can be a double-edged sword. While they provide support, they can also introduce complexities and conflicts. Navigating differing family values and expectations necessitates diplomacy and setting healthy boundaries to preserve marital peace.

25. Risk of Abuse

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Trapped in a toxic cycle, some relationships turn abusive, impacting emotional and physical well-being. Recognizing the signs of abuse and seeking help are critical steps to ensure safety and prevent further harm, reinforcing the importance of fostering a healthy partnership.

26. Neglected Hobbies

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As marital responsibilities grow, individual hobbies can diminish in importance. Engaging in activities you're passionate about can fall by the wayside, affecting personal fulfillment. Juggling hobbies and relationship commitments necessitates time management and support from both partners.

27. Self-Discovery Lost

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Embracing change and self-discovery are vital for personal growth. Marriage, while enriching, might limit the freedom to explore new avenues and pursue individual passions. Striving for self-improvement within the context of a partnership requires understanding and encouragement.

28. Pressure to Settle

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External expectations can spur hasty decisions. Succumbing to societal norms might result in choosing partners who aren't the best fit. Recognizing the difference between personal desires and societal expectations is crucial to making informed, authentic choices.

29. Financial Dependence

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Dependency on a partner's income can lead to vulnerability during divorce or separation, depending on what type of person your SO actually is. Maintaining financial independence safeguards against potential hardships, ensuring stability even when faced with unexpected relationship changes.

30. Love's Natural Course

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Championing unconventional beliefs, some argue that love can flourish beyond the confines of traditional unions. Advocates of this view assert that commitment need not be sanctioned by marriage, advocating for partnerships based on individual choice rather than societal dictates.

31. People are sharing their regrets about getting married young: "I wound up working two jobs to support us"

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"I regret not waiting until we had a chance to be adults together... I got married right out of high school to my HS sweetheart... He was not at all prepared for adult life, so I wound up working two jobs to support us... If we'd waited, I would have had a chance to see - before we got married - that he wasn't ready to grow up."

32. "He changed when I got pregnant"

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"We got married at 24 and 21 and had our son two years later. He changed when I got pregnant and was really unsympathetic about my pregnancy... he called my postpartum depression 'attention-seeking'... We split when our son was 3... and I so regret marrying his father before I truly realized the kind of person he was."

33. "I do wonder if some aspects of my marriage would be easier if my spouse were a woman"

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"I'm bisexual and never gave myself the opportunity to be in a committed relationship with a woman... I'd love to hold off on getting married for at least 3-5 years and see what might have been... I do love my husband... but I do wonder if some aspects of my marriage would be easier if my spouse were a woman."

34. "We stayed together for more than 10 years but were unhappy"

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"I got married at 21 because I came from a super-religious family... We stayed together for more than 10 years but were unhappy for most of the last few... we are both much happier apart. By the time we hit 30, we were completely different people than we were at 20. We grew apart instead of growing together."

35. "I should've seen the red flags"

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"I got married at 25 and divorced at 26... looking back now (I'm 31), I should've seen the red flags. He was controlling in the 'I love you, so you should do this' type of way... I always felt like the babysitter, having to make sure he wasn't saying anything embarrassing or insulting..."

36. "My husband married me thinking that I would eventually change my mind on some topics"

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"I married at 22... we weren't mature or experienced enough to recognize harmful patterns... my husband married me thinking that I would eventually change my mind on some topics to be more in line with him. He told me for years that he was OK with my preferences until it became clear that I wasn't going to change my mind."

37. "I wish I could have grown up first"

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"I married at 19. I wish I could have grown up first and figured out myself and who I am. Instead, I grew up with him, his likes, etc. I didn't know for a long time who I was without him." It's so important to know yourself before you get into any type of relationship, and especially before marriage! And this just goes to show.

38. "I spent many nights crying myself to sleep"

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"I got married at 20 and divorced at 23... I was too young to know how difficult it was 'supposed' to be, and I spent the first year wondering, 'Is it supposed to be THIS hard?' I spent many nights crying myself to sleep and wishing I hadn't gotten married so I could just walk out."

39. "We weren't sure we were going to make it"

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"We got married at 22 and 25. We come from different cultures and family dynamics... There was a point about two years in where we weren't sure we were going to make it, but after a serious discussion and many self-help relationship books... we got through it."

40. "I do, however, regret our wedding"

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"I got married at 20 (27 now), and it was the perfect time... and I regret absolutely nothing about the marriage! I do, however, regret our wedding! I didn't know myself... so I would have done a LOT differently... I would have made it a lot smaller, more meaningful, and not relied on my family so much."

41. "I would have lived alone for a year or two"

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"I met my future husband in the first year of college... We were living in a shared apartment with friends, and then after we got engaged, we moved into an apartment for just the two of us. If I had the chance to do it over, I would have lived alone for a year or two - I never had the experience..."

42. "Our faith was one of the only things we had in common"

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"I got married in my early 20s to someone I had only been with a year... The problem is we were at a Christian seminary and thought we were going to be missionaries. Our faith was one of the only things we had in common at all. Fast-forward five years, and I have completely separated from Christianity and have no desire to be a part of the community of the church. He still does."

43. "My biggest regret is having children"

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"I graduated in 1991, and we were married in July of the same year... having our first baby when I was 20 and our second at 21 wasn't a good idea. We went on to have a total of six kids. Of those six, only three still speak to me. If I could do it all over again, I wouldn't have kids at all."

44. "I got married at 23 against my better judgement"

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"I read an article one time that said the part of our brain that's in charge of decision-making doesn't fully develop until age 25... I told my boyfriend I wouldn't want to get married until after 25... he proposed to me when I was 22... The marriage lasted for four years, and it ended badly."

45. "I made TONS of mistakes"

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"I regret being so emotionally immature. I made TONS of mistakes with how I handled conflict with my husband. I wish I would have gone to therapy to heal my hurts (which I didn't even realize were there in my 20s) before getting married." Definitely work on healing yourself, first!

46. "The only thing I regret is not being able to date in general"

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"The only thing I regret is not getting to have a 'h*e phase' or just being able to date in general. I think that would have been an interesting experience. But seeing my friends having to through the dating scene seems exhausting, and I'm glad I've stuck with the same man for 15 years!"

47. "Our interests were vastly different"

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"I regret that neither of us took into account how we would mature as people... Our interests were vastly different, our sense of self changed, and so did our life goals. In the end, it was significant enough for us to part way as we were effectively living two entirely different lives..."

48. "I still wonder"

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"We got married right after college. I don't regret it necessarily, but I wonder occasionally if we settled because it was all we really knew. I love them and our life, but I still wonder." That's one of the biggest things marrying right out of college... wondering if it could have been different - but the grass isn't always greener!

49. "Most people just change too much in their 20s"

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"I'm literally signing the divorce papers this week after more than a decade together. I truly believe that most people just change too much in their 20s to choose the right life partner." It's always a risk - one you could get very right, or very wrong. But mid 20s does seem to be a good ballpark to aim for, for knowing what you want!

50. "I regret marrying someone when we were both still trying to figure out who we were"

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"He is six years older than me, and we met my first year in undergrad... At the time, he seemed really driven, but as we grew into the next decade, his transmission was still stuck in his 20s. He's now almost 40 and is still talking about trying to do things the same way he was almost 20 years ago... Everything we have is because of me."